I'm pretty upset about this right now.
First of all, I'm transgender. Naturally, this means that I'd choose trans as my gender on a cam site. Here's the dilemma: I'm only 6 months into my transition. Hormones generally take a bit longer to achieve the full effect. This means I still look quite male, but my body is still more feminine than probably over 99% of all males my age.
During my show today, everyone was calling me "he" and "boy" and it was very uncomforting. Someone told me that I'd "be better off in the trans category". Which, I was in the trans category! During the show someone on the CB staff must have switched my gender to male. I was being shown in the male category and in my profile it indeed had my gender as "male". Sure, I topped at somewhere over 350 viewers and was the 2nd or 3rd most popular in the male category, but I'm not a guy!
I'm extremely offended by this. I have very strong feelings about my gender, and I actually spent probably around 30 minutes yesterday crying over some of the issues I face as a transgender woman. I know I may not be as feminine as I could be considering how early I am in my transition, but it's not even like all transgender individuals are even fortunate enough to be able to pass as their preferred gender.
I've only been doing cam modeling for about 1.5 months. I wasn't sure about doing cam modeling at this point in my transition because my body hasn't developed enough yet. Being desperate for money has brought me to tears. I need money more than ever so that I can have a successful transition. Things like hormones, doctor visits, and hair removal are very expensive over time! Hair removal alone costs thousands of dollars. I'd much rather be working a minimum wage job than cam modeling, but I haven't had so much luck with getting a job and I'm afraid of being discriminated against for being transgender. It is legal for an employer to fire or not hire someone for being transgender. It's ridiculous, but that's the sort of country America is.
Anyways, back to my point, it's very hurtful to make wrong assumptions about a transgender person's gender based on their appearance. I did end up changing my gender back to trans. After my show, I went out for a few hours. I just got back shortly ago and when I checked my account it was changed back to male again. Sure, I'd probably get tons of complaints if I were to place myself in the female category, but is it really that much of a problem that I'm in the trans category?
I've been feeling depressed for the past 2 weeks or so because of my gender dysphoria. Something great happened yesterday and I felt like I was getting past it, but today I feel like I'll be going back to my depressed state.
I might contact the Chaturbate staff about my issue. Honestly, I feel like I want to stop cam modeling or work on Streamate instead. I don't want to have to put up with all the hateful comments and constantly being told that I'm a guy when I feel that I'm anything but. It's not like I get a whole lot of these comments. They just pop up every now and then.
I'm so disgusted.
First of all, I'm transgender. Naturally, this means that I'd choose trans as my gender on a cam site. Here's the dilemma: I'm only 6 months into my transition. Hormones generally take a bit longer to achieve the full effect. This means I still look quite male, but my body is still more feminine than probably over 99% of all males my age.
During my show today, everyone was calling me "he" and "boy" and it was very uncomforting. Someone told me that I'd "be better off in the trans category". Which, I was in the trans category! During the show someone on the CB staff must have switched my gender to male. I was being shown in the male category and in my profile it indeed had my gender as "male". Sure, I topped at somewhere over 350 viewers and was the 2nd or 3rd most popular in the male category, but I'm not a guy!
I'm extremely offended by this. I have very strong feelings about my gender, and I actually spent probably around 30 minutes yesterday crying over some of the issues I face as a transgender woman. I know I may not be as feminine as I could be considering how early I am in my transition, but it's not even like all transgender individuals are even fortunate enough to be able to pass as their preferred gender.
I've only been doing cam modeling for about 1.5 months. I wasn't sure about doing cam modeling at this point in my transition because my body hasn't developed enough yet. Being desperate for money has brought me to tears. I need money more than ever so that I can have a successful transition. Things like hormones, doctor visits, and hair removal are very expensive over time! Hair removal alone costs thousands of dollars. I'd much rather be working a minimum wage job than cam modeling, but I haven't had so much luck with getting a job and I'm afraid of being discriminated against for being transgender. It is legal for an employer to fire or not hire someone for being transgender. It's ridiculous, but that's the sort of country America is.
Anyways, back to my point, it's very hurtful to make wrong assumptions about a transgender person's gender based on their appearance. I did end up changing my gender back to trans. After my show, I went out for a few hours. I just got back shortly ago and when I checked my account it was changed back to male again. Sure, I'd probably get tons of complaints if I were to place myself in the female category, but is it really that much of a problem that I'm in the trans category?
I've been feeling depressed for the past 2 weeks or so because of my gender dysphoria. Something great happened yesterday and I felt like I was getting past it, but today I feel like I'll be going back to my depressed state.
I might contact the Chaturbate staff about my issue. Honestly, I feel like I want to stop cam modeling or work on Streamate instead. I don't want to have to put up with all the hateful comments and constantly being told that I'm a guy when I feel that I'm anything but. It's not like I get a whole lot of these comments. They just pop up every now and then.
I'm so disgusted.