asianbabecams
Jr. Member
While browsing through older forum topics, I was relieved to find that I am not the first to approach this topic. I have been careful about approaching it as it makes many people, namely men, uncomfortable. This past fall, I was diagnosed with stage 3b breast cancer. Mine is (was?) a particularly aggressive form that would require "very aggressive treatment". First chemo to shrink the mass to an "operable size", seeing as it was 6cm. Next, surgery for the breast and infected lymph nodes. and finally, radiation with more chemo. The chemo was hell, but it shrunk it down to where I only had to have a lumpectomy . I just finished my last surgery and it was the 6th surgery in the last 6 months , counting having a port put in my chest for chemo. I dropped camming , though a few regulars skyped with me from time to time and knew about the illness.I began selling content more, but keep trying to get going on cam again but cant seem to get past a profile as independent. I stop there because I cant explain periods of absence or deal with having to make things up to talk about that dont eventually tie into this. I can mask the physical scars, but one of my strongest attributes is that I am very genuine with customers, so hiding something so huge would kill any regular customer base. My regulars dont even elude to sex until we have filled each other in on our lives. I wont reveal it because I was shocked by how my male friends ( not customers) dealt with the news. I am new to OKC and have few friends and love keeping up with my old friend via email and facebook, but several of my guy friends simply disappeared. It was really weird and it hurt a little. To top it off, my meds for clinical depression clash with the chemo so depression has become a thing I fight constantly. I dont let it win, but it wears me down. I don't want to be pitied or be seen as whining, so Im stuck. Im really grateful I don't depend on camming financially, but I am so frustrated that I am somewhat forced to sit it out. I m sorry for this huge post, but its complicated. I m thinking about doing some fetish videos just to feel productive and take the attention off of my boobs for a while (foot fetish, maybe) and yet give me an outlet for my exhibitionism besides pic sets. Thanks for bearing with me, I could seriously write a book at this point.
