There is a pinned post regarding these types of threads, which is important to read to recognise warning signs from other people's experiences.
But it's a lot to read at once for a new member looking for help, so I want to try something different.
I understand these kinds of threads will continue to be made, but if a quick general bulletpoint list of red flags can help just one person from getting scammed, it'll be worth it.
Red flags:
The main takeaway is that spending money makes you a customer; spending time off-site, in free one-on-one chats and meeting up in person is more positively a boyfriend.
But no two camgirls are alike. Everyone has their own moral code. Some people will go far to be your fantasy girlfriend, putting the responsibility on you to know it's fantasy because she's on an adult entertainment site, not a dating site, and is asking to be compensated for her time. Others draw the line before anything blurs it.
I hope this bulletpoint format was helpful. Members and models alike, feel free to add red flags.
But it's a lot to read at once for a new member looking for help, so I want to try something different.
I understand these kinds of threads will continue to be made, but if a quick general bulletpoint list of red flags can help just one person from getting scammed, it'll be worth it.
Red flags:
- She's asking you for money.
She wants money in exchange for the time you two spend together. She needs help covering her pet's vet costs. She has a sick grandmother. She wants a day off. She's still viewing you as a customer, not a boyfriend.
- She never spends her free time with you off-site.
Many sites don't allow off-site contact, but if she truly felt you are worth pursuing, she would follow you.
I'm not condoning risking a ban, but if she has no other ways to be contacted, consider giving your email/way of contact in chat (you might be banned, but if this is relationship is legit, at least she wouldn't lose a source of income while trying to contact you off-site), and she never followed up to spend free time with you - or only follows up to ask you to follow her on new sites where you're pressured to spend money in private shows/tips/etc - she still views you as a customer.
- She wants you to be in her camroom.
This one is more personal and not a complete guarantee that she's a scammer. Some couples truly have one camming while the other mods. My perspective: I'd never want a boyfriend watching while I'm working. I'm not the same person on cam as I am off it, and it's awkward to start prioritising high tippers over my own boyfriend in the moment because I'm at work, I'm working! Why would she want you on camsites? She's very likely viewing you as a customer.
- She says she loves you
Yet she's known you a short time, has only spoken to you on camsites, has never met you irl. Does she have something to gain from making you feel like this? Yes: the money you keep giving her.
- She stops giving you her time and affection when you stop paying her.
So the fastest way to recognise whether or not you're getting scammed is to stop paying her entirely. Not even a cent. At most, offer to pay for her travel to you and vice versa, and the dates you'll have in person (and even then, tread carefully to make sure you're a boyfriend, not a sugar daddy or customer). You're in a relationship, right, so why does money need to be involved? Or are you still a customer?
The main takeaway is that spending money makes you a customer; spending time off-site, in free one-on-one chats and meeting up in person is more positively a boyfriend.
But no two camgirls are alike. Everyone has their own moral code. Some people will go far to be your fantasy girlfriend, putting the responsibility on you to know it's fantasy because she's on an adult entertainment site, not a dating site, and is asking to be compensated for her time. Others draw the line before anything blurs it.
I hope this bulletpoint format was helpful. Members and models alike, feel free to add red flags.
