disapointed and feeling crummy

[SasshaRed]

so last night I was not able to go on cam just cause I wanted to get some rest and sleep.

lately with my schedule when I have been getting on its later at night. And I end kind of pushing myself to stay on for a while.

I have made money this week but I know I have not reached $30 yet whichI know I need to get up to that much to be able to have a check mailed off to me.

and now on a night I wanted to get back on again. I am running a fever, not a very bad one but a low grade fever. I want to go on and try to make some more money but I am afriad of pushing myself too hard....and getting sicker. lol and I guess I keep thinking who in the world is going to pay to see a girl that is sick and that might get sick on cam lol.

worst case senario I don't end up going on tonight and I rest up go on tomrrow and reach my $30 mark......so I can get some money coming in ....but even if I can't get to that point this week I always have next week also.

I just have to keep remindind myself I am new to all this and I just need to take baby steps to things. It would be great if I could get the minimum amount I need on the first night...but some times it just doesn't always work like that and it perfectly ok. I am showing up and being consistent and growing a fan base of clients and that's a really important factor to things I think.

what do you all think? have you ever cammed when you were sick....lol who knows maybe there is a fetish for that kind of thing? lol

its technically a job where you don't even leave your bed..... so there is that.

 

[SasshaRed]

Hey Lady ~ You speak the truth!! I have had chronic allergies since birth and I am older than my profile says, but that is me... I played in a band for years getting strep throat EVERY 2 Weeks for 2 years... many years of stress in that industry (even tho I loved it) starts to wear on us, jumping around in high heel boots with a 15 lb guitar was no biggie then, but now I have a weak lower back and the Joan Jett lower belly pooch at any weight, then in the last 6 yrs I've had my Dad, brother, niece, nephew, 2 best friends all pass away, then my beautiful long haired husband left me and some days are just too heavy on the emotions and no one wants to see that!!

Fighting foreclosure with the mortgage company put me into camming, but after weeks of tenant abuse, destruction of property, and no extra money to fix or formerly evict... I am drained physically and emotionally on top of all the other.

I know I need money, that would let me buy better food, or go to the doctor and buy my monthly meds. Who wants to go on cam stressed and not feeling good about anything much less ourselves.

This is a Catch-22 for sure. Chicken or the Egg, you know?