Stressed to the max!! My love and I just moved into a new house yay!!! Buttttt now we have major bills due with deposits and new utilities and the such. Normally I'm not stressed about things like this, I just buckle down and work extra hard. This time is different, I have had to deal with 3 deaths in my family in the last month and the 1 year anniversary (is that what it is?) of my little brothers death is in 1 week, 1 day and 7 hours. Needless to say, I am a wreck and no one likes a crying cam girl. I haven't really vented to anyone about this because I don't want to seem like I'm looking for a pity party or something. But I have come to a max point where if I don't let some of this out of my head it's going to explode! I started camming bc 1. I have a very high sex drive and like to show off 2. my bf suggested it and has no problem with it, he is even going to start joining me soon. 3. I suffer from bi-polar disorder and have a very hard time holding a steady job for long periods of time and as I get older it gets worse. I have periods of such extreme anxiety, paranoia and depression that I can't be around other people besides close friends and family. I thought camming would be great for me and it was until all this family stuff started happening. I have been unable to steadily cam for about 3 weeks now but this week was really important to pull my end of the bills I have to make $500 this week! The clincher is I need to be able to make most of this before this Saturday and I don't want to do much live camming, I just don't have the spunk to draw an audience the more I try to force it the more anxious I get. My face has always been an open book. Any sugg. idea's would be great! I'm on MGF and ifriends (although I haven't done anything on there yet) and of course cgc. Thanks for reading and sharing thoughts and ideas. I'm pretty new here and haven't posted much but I love this site and the opportunity it gives us to connect with each other. I will be on a lot more as I focus more on independent ventures.
